Please, click on the word Metallica.

This post is about things I’ve noticed I like, and things I don’t. If you are easily offended, sensitive and politically correct or Metallica, stop reading. 

Let’s start off with the things I like: 

1. Bowties

 

I don’t just like bowties, I love them, and it’s not just because I’m southern. Nothing says you have confidence, class and the balls of Andrew Jackson more than rocking a bowtie. I will agree that they have time and event qualifications, but if I can get away with it, I’m wearing one. And wearing it isn’t even my favorite part. Now, it’s no secret that I love pissing people off, but if you happen to glance at me with a disapproving facial expression, I am going to give you one back that will piss you off faster than if I told the police I saw you put a kilo of cocaine in your trunk. Plus, you never have to worry about food getting on your tie. Ever.

2. Hard Rock Music

 

Most of the music I post on this blog falls into three catagories: indie, electronic or “this is borderline uncomfortable because I am white” rap. However when the mood beckons, I gladly pull out the hard rock and nothing calms a person down faster than leaping around the room to Chevelle’s Vena Sera album. Even if there is nothing to be angry about, their music is like a sedative to my soul. That and it makes me really, really want to run.

3. Foods That Hurt Coming Out

 

Now, let me clarify. I love food. I love food. But if what I’m eating doesn’t cause a panic attack, or at least a five-second “I hope my cellphone calls 911 on accident because I might die” reaction, I’m not really satiated. That isn’t to say that other foods don’t give me pleasure when I’m eating them, but this is kind of like that birthday party where the invitations for the other non-spicy foods “got lost in the mail.”

4. Ridiculous Phrases Said By Otherwise Normal People

I’ll make this one quick. When my friend turns around and says:

Hey, what do you think the worst part of being blind is?

I can’t help but feel pleased that I get to respond to something I’m not sure I even heard correctly.

Tomorrow I’ll tackle the things I don’t like.

 

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